According to the Australian National Sleep Research Project a new baby results in 400-750 hours of lost sleep for the parents during the first year. Numerous studies have been done about sleep loss. Sleep loss affects one’s ability to concentrate and think clearly. It causes irritability and stress. It also lowers the body’s ability to fight illness and may lead to health problems. One study states, “All new mothers experience some sleep loss following childbirth, as their estrogen and progesterone hormone levels plunge.” Neurotransmitters that influence sleep quality also affect mood, increasing sleep deprived mothers’ risk for depression.” Combine this hormonal explanation for decreased sleep with the inevitable middle of the night feedings and that’s even less sleep.
Sleep loss was a major factor in my postpartum depression. Before I ever had children I worked all hours of the night, but when I got home I slept 8-9 hours. After my first child I took naps during the day whenever he slept. After number 2 I was in for a shock! I couldn't nap much during the day. I was absolutely exhausted.
Of course the middle of the night feedings can’t be avoided. The first couple of months are the most sleep deprived. Take advantage of any opportunity to take a nap. Enlist the help of family or friends willing to baby-sit so you can nap. Eventually a time does come when babies start sleeping for longer periods of time and wake up less often. Once you’re at the point that your baby is sleeping more regularly during the night, it’s important to take care of yourself. Getting sleep is critical. It’s hard to operate on less sleep that your body requires.
A while back I was tired all the time. Mid morning would come and I'd sit on the couch unable to keep my eyes open. I would nod off, and my little boy would come poke me saying, "Momma, eyes open!" I couldn't function. I was dragging all day. We were relying on pizza, chicken nuggets, and other convenience foods because I was just too tired to cook. Messes were piling up. I was stuck in a rut because I wasn't sleeping well at night.
I've heard women complain that they can't go to bed with dirty dishes in the sink or other chores undone. Admittedly I too have lain awake, unable to sleep, because of something left unfinished. I’ve suffered from anxiety all too much. I force myself to go to bed, and then lay there with my thoughts racing unable to rest. At the end of the day it’s important to have peace knowing you tried your best, not be full of anxiety over what didn’t get done.
When the children were sleeping, I'd catch myself loading the dishwasher at 12am. I’d look at all the chores needing to be done. I do what I can, but have learned that I need to set boundaries. I need to give myself a bedtime. Staying up late and loosing sleep doesn’t help. I will just be more tired the next day and be even less productive.When you're just trying to survive dishes, laundry, vacuuming, etc. aren’t that important. It’s not being lazy to go to bed when you’re exhausted. So if things aren't done, oh well, there's always tomorrow. Sure it might be a little harder preparing breakfast if there's stuff laying around. But if I'm bleary eyed and dragging because I stayed up too late that's not good either.
So what’s one to do? At one point my doctor wrote me a prescription for Ambien. Later I decided to go the natural route, and my naturopath recommended an herbal tincture. How about prayer? Pray that God will take all these little burdens. Shed them and leave them with God. Ask God for peace, rest, and a good night sleep.
"It is vain for you to rise up early, to sit up late, to eat the bread of sorrows: for so he giveth his beloved sleep." Psalm 127:2 (KJV)
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